I watched a great movie last night. It was called "Our Idiot Brother." Paul Rudd was the star and he was fantastic. And though there were some parts that were hilariously inappropriate, this movie offers me and the rest of us some great reminders.
We all get busier and busier in our lives. I have put much effort into going the total opposite direction, and praise God that I am seeing some of the results. Either way though, on the whole, commotion is the norm. With that commotion comes a bit of focusing in on our own issues, and totally forgetting that we aren't the only person in this world. Repeatedly in this movie, Rudd's character was "in the way" or "ruining my life", but truth was, he was seeing the WHOLE picture, while others' views were much smaller.
I think as a parent that is tough sometimes. I know I expect alot of my kids. I see them for what they are capable of because of the things they have shown me. But that is MY view of them. MY view of what I want for their lives. Although my intentions are good, I think sometimes these best intentions can bring negativity---for me AND them.
Watching this movie reminded me that every little detail being perfect and how I would prefer it to be doesn't really matter. It just doesn't. If I am so busy focusing more on the rules and structure, then I am missing the joy and getting to know our kids for who they truly are. Why would they want to be around me and open up if they are worried all the time about failing? Don't get me wrong, things like respect, structure, rules, etc are a great thing. A NEEDED thing for teaching. A MUST have. But the question for me---and you---is where is that line?
The thing I keep coming back to in my head is my relationship with Jesus. It is not about rules. It is not about keeping score. It is ALL about a relationship. A relationship where God sees me for who I am.
I once went to a church where the preacher was all about hell, fire, and brimstone. Although he was dynamic and truthful, his message ended up on alot of deaf ears because everybody felt like dog crap by the time they heard the same thing every week. How are you going to take that message to the streets and invite people to your church when all they are going to get is beaten down? There is a place for everything, sure, but that makes no sense to me at all.
Needless to say, I did not grow there. I was surrounded by good people with good hearts and good intentions, but that wasn't enough. Now, I worship at a church where you just come as you are. You are accepted for who you are. The sole focus is about growth in a relationship with Jesus. That happens at different times and in different steps for different people. But the same fundamentals have to be there. It has to be about the bigger picture. "Self" has no place. Judgement has no place. The only thing that matters is seeing people for who they are. What's in their heart. Taking them at their word. And loving them---unconditionally.
Joy is a beautiful thing. In the eyes and hearts of our children, and also in the eyes and hearts of others. I hope that I can be sure and keep the "self" out of my life so that I don't miss all of the beauty and opportunity to love and serve others that is passing right before me.
Just a little something to think about...
